REVEALED: THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BRIDAL SHOWER AND BACHELORETTE PARTY EVENTS!

Written By: Bec  |  Last Updated: 08.11.2024

Imagine, for just one moment… you’re engaged (woohoo!), you’ve chosen your bridal party, and the wedding planning has well and truly begun. Everything is slowly coming together, with your big day fast approaching.

​And whilst you’ve been busying yourself with a ridiculously long list of tasks that go hand-in-hand with organizing such a large event, those beautiful bridesmaids of yours have been secretly planning something too. A special celebration for your beautiful self! One last hurrah where you can celebrate your final days as a ‘single woman' whilst surrounded by best friends and family.

Which begs the question… how do you want to spend your ‘final fling before the ring’?
Hen’s party, bridal shower or kitchen tea?

But to answer this question, you first need to know: what IS the difference between bridal showers and bachelorette parties? Is a kitchen tea and bridal shower the same thing? Or are there some key differences?

To help, we discuss the three different options below!
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THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A KITCHEN TEA, BRIDAL SHOWER & BACHELORETTE PARTY (QUICK OVERVIEW)

There are three types of pre-wedding events - but what is the actual difference between them all? Let's start with the Kitchen Tea. Relaxed and often held during the day, a Kitchen Tea involves the bride's closest friends and family gathering, sharing advice, and enjoying some refreshments/light meals. Guests often bring gifts suitable for the kitchen. A Bridal Shower is VERY similar to this. Light meals, refreshments and games are commonplace at this type of event. Guests' may also take the opportunity to 'shower' the bride-to-be with gifts for the home. In contrast to these relaxed family affairs, a Hens Party (or Bachelorette) is often quite the adventure. Typically involving drinks, nibbles, games and an activity or two; this type of celebration may span over a couple of hours or a few days.

​What is a Kitchen Tea?

WHAT DO YOU DO AT A KITCHEN TEA?
Generally held during the day, a ‘Kitchen Tea’ is a fairly relaxed occasion whereby the bride’s closest friends and family (including the groom’s family) gather to share advice regarding the kitchen, enjoy some refreshments, dig in to some light meals and/or high tea, and play a couple of sweet games.

It is also commonplace for guests to bring along small gifts suitable for the kitchen (a way to help the happy couple set up their marital home).



WHO SCORES AN INVITE?
This type of celebration is perfect for those who wish to include the generations in their special day; with grandmothers, aunts, parents and younger family members all finding a Kitchen Tea welcoming and enjoyable.

And whilst this type of event was traditionally reserved for female friends and family only, the guest list is entirely up to the host (meaning close male friend/s and family members are more than welcome to take part in the day if you wish!).

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WHERE DO YOU CELEBRATE?
When it comes to location, the beauty of hosting a Kitchen Tea is that there are an abundance of options! As long as the venue is somewhere you feel comfortable celebrating, giggling and telling stories, there is no reason you can’t celebrate there.

Whether this be a café, local restaurant, house or even a picnic in the park/at the beach depends on your budget and the style of party you’re after.
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Related: Your Ultimate Kitchen Tea Planning Guide
Related: Kitchen Tea Activity Ideas

FUN KITCHEN TEA GAME IDEA:
A sweet, fun and useful Kitchen Tea activity involves asking each guest to write down their favourite recipe prior to the event; bringing it along with them on the actual day.

When everyone has arrived, collect the recipes and stick them into a scrapbook. Leave this on a ‘guest book’ table alongside a Polaroid camera and some pens. This gives guests’ the chance to add photos of themselves with the bride-to-be, extra notes, etc. next to their recipe contribution.

​Memories of the day will come flooding back every time the bride uses this book to create masterpieces in the kitchen!
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Related: Kitchen Tea Game Ideas

​↑ Click here to view/download this 'Recipe' game card! ↑

​What is a Bridal Shower (or Wedding Shower)?

WHAT DO YOU DO AT A BRIDAL SHOWER?​
Typically a daytime event, a ‘Bridal Shower’ is basically a relaxed celebration with your close family members (including the groom’s family) and friends.

Similar to the Kitchen Tea, light meals or high tea is enjoyed, refreshments are served, a few fun games are played, and advice regarding married life and/or the home is shared. Guests’ may also take this opportunity to ‘shower’ the bride-to-be with gifts (hence the name!). However, unlike the ‘Kitchen Tea’ where gifts are reserved for the kitchen only, offers received at a Bridal Shower can be used anywhere in
the home.​

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THE BRIDAL SHOWER GUEST LIST
Once again, this is a fantastic way to celebrate with grandmothers, aunts, parents and younger family members. A traditional bridal shower is a female-only event; however as mentioned earlier, it is entirely up to you who makes the final invite list!
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WHERE DO YOU CELEBRATE?
Whether your bridal shower brunch, lunch or afternoon tea is held at the maid of honour’s house or a favourite café down the road, it’s bound to be lots of fun! As with the Kitchen tea, just make sure the chosen venue is somewhere you feel comfortable sharing stories, having a laugh and letting loose (just a little bit!).

FUN BRIDAL SHOWER GAME IDEA:
This is a favourite of ours because it’s a fun activity and beautiful keepsake all in one! To play, simply ask each guest to write down their favourite memory involving the bride-to-be onto a piece of paper. Collect each memory and, one-by-one, read them aloud to the group. The bride-to-be must then try and guess who each memory belongs to (she may even like to tell the back story if it’s a good one!).

​After the shower, stick each of the memories into a scrapbook or photo album – a lovely souvenir from a wonderful day!

Related: Ultimate List of Bridal Shower Games
Related: Bridal Shower Game Prizes

↑ Click here to view/download these beautiful 'Memories' game cards! ↑

What is a Hen's Party (or Bachelorette Party)?

WHAT IS A HEN'S PARTY?
In complete contrast to the relaxed family affairs mentioned above, a ‘Hens Party’ is often quite the adventure! Generally beginning with some drinks, nibbles and ice-breaker games, the hens soon move on to an activity or two.

Depending on the bride’s preferences (it’s always a good idea to find out what type of celebration she’s after before planning anything!), these activities could be anything from a spa day or wine tasting to a group dance class or strip show. Some pre-wedding events even extend over a few days; with a celebratory weekend getaway becoming more popular in recent years.

By the time the pre-planned shenanigans have finished, expect guests to be well and truly in party mode! Whether it's a one day event or mini holiday, it’s not uncommon for celebrations to continue well into the small hours of the morning.



WHO SCORES AN INVITE?
As a hens party can be quite revealing at times, the bride-to-be must feel comfortable with those in attendance. Therefore, inviting the bride’s close friends and, if she doesn’t get embarrassed easily, the bride’s family, is a safe bet. This is definitely not the type of event for youngsters (and grandmothers may not appreciate an invite either!).

That being said, a hens party doesn’t have to be all cheek. Many brides are opting for classy celebrations these days – no peckers in site – making them more accommodating to other attendees!

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WHERE DO YOU CELEBRATE?
When it comes to location, hen’s parties differ greatly. Almost always they begin at a particular meeting point (such as a house, hotel room or restaurant). This provides time for guests to arrive, get to know one another, and have a few drinks/nibbles before anything too crazy kicks off.

Where to next depends on what has been planned. Travel to activities is quite common; however with so many mobile entertainment options available these days, hen parties at home (or at one particular venue) are becoming more and more popular.
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Related: Details You Can't Miss on Hen Do Invites
Related: 90+ Fail Proof Hen Party Activities

FUN HEN/BACHELORETTE GAME IDEA:
​‘Before’ and ‘After’ photos make for some hilarious keepsakes (whilst simultaneously highlighting the great time everyone had). Simply take a picture of each guest as they arrive (looking Ah-mazing!), holding a blackboard or sign that says ‘Before’. Take another photo as guests’ leave (this time holding a board or sign that says ‘After’).

​Stick each guests’ before and after photo next to each other in a book and challenge your hen to NOT smile when she looks back at it!

Related: Ultimate List of Hen Party Games

↑ Click here to view/download this beautiful 'Before & After' sign pack! ↑

​Bridal Shower Vs. Bachelorette - What Now?

In summary, the main difference between each of these events is the level of mischievousness! And when it comes to celebrating, there is no right or wrong choice.

So go with the option that best suits your bride’s personality and then plan accordingly (if you really don't know how she wants to celebrate, ask her!). This will not only mean that you can organize something truly special, but will also ensure that the guest of honour doesn’t end up getting whisked away on a hen’s party when what she really wanted was a bridal shower (or vice versa). 

To help with your planning journey, check out the 'Party Planning Tips' page by clicking here!

Related to Pre-Wedding Parties

​PLANNING A KITCHEN TEA:

So you're hosting a Kitchen Tea for your best friend or sibling and cannot wait to start planning! Which begs the question... where exactly do you start your planning? And what exactly do you need to plan for? Jam packed full of amazing Kitchen Tea ideas, this article 100% has your back!

Click here to read the article now.

PERSONALISED HEN DO IDEAS:

From accessories to drinks, this article outlines the many ways you can add an unexpected yet much appreciated touch to your best friend's day - making her feel special and loved whilst simultaneously guaranteeing that it's an event she will never forget!

Click here to read the article now.

Concluding on Bridal Shower Vs. Bachelorette Party Events

​Whether you end up organizing a casual high tea, a cheeky night on the town, or a little bit of both, it’s sure to be an event to remember! Why? Because when someone is surrounded by all of their incredible friends at the same time, fun and laughs WILL be had – no matter where you are or what you’re doing!

If you have anything else to add, please don't hesitate to share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Cheers to celebrating this exciting time in the best way possible!

Much love, keep smiling - Bec x
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P.S. The image below is perfect for Pinterest... Go on and share what the major difference between a bridal shower and bachelorette party is - you know you want to! :)